Runner's Blog - Certifiable

So this is gonna be a quickie.... inasmuch as I am actually capable of such things.  One week later = 3 weeks into the 30 day workout and a new crunch time goal for running training.  And by crunch time, I mean "stumbled on an entry slot for a race this Saturday" crunch time.  (look here, and you'll see in full color my sudden obsession with entering something official).  Yesterday, I just happened to mention off-hand that I was bummed about the sold-out status of the race, and my new baker friend Liz called me to the table as a replacement for someone with an unfortunate injury.  She didn't know I was bluffing, so I had to see her bet before she could call my hand, which means getting serious about doing some running so I don't make a complete ass out of myself in three days.

This is how I work best.

Most people around me would probably say that I am a very strategic, analytical, and deliberate thinker.  It's not that they would be wrong, it's just that for all the time I spend analyzing and strategizing, most of it goes out the window when it comes time for me to make the final call.  It seems as though a disproportionately huge amount of my active successes in life are achieved as the result of pushing myself to meet some unrealistic, ill-timed goal brought on by a gut instinct decision: DO IT, OR DON'T.  In this case, I'm doing it (provided that all the registration can be transferred over, blah blah boring stuff).  And to get prepped, I dropped the pretense, plugged in the tunes, fired up the training app, did the stretching and the timing, and even the "hardcore" workout, and then I went running.  4.5k.  And I feel pretty good.  What was all the fuss about again? 

Runner's Log - 2 weeks later

Ahem.... so, right back to it, eh?  As you can guess, my slacking off is a condition that expands beyond the blogosphere right into my running shoes.  After the last time I wrote, I may have gone running once, not that I remember, particularly.  But not to worry, my activity did not completely cease.  I've spent the time working on the yard, whipping the house into shape, and whipping myself into shape, finding little glimmers of motivation here and there, and completely ruining my theories about needing to find the zen space between my heels and the asphalt.

Recently I've been spending the occasional Saturday morning working out with a friend.  I was a little embarrassed by the strenuous amount of effort it took me to get through one little 30 minute video workout, so I decided to study on my own time.  Equipment:  2 hand weights and one workout video promising amazing results in 30 days (all under $25 from the Bulls-eye) and one bleary-eyed, just-out-of-bed body.  First of all, let me just say that I don't believe any claims about anything.  Ever.  That being said, I took the "ripped in 30 days" claim of the video as a challenge.  I'll do damn near anything I have to to prove it doesn't work, or I'll kill myself (and by kill, I mean accidentally shape up and have to eat my words, which can be a very poisonous diet) trying.

As of now, I'm smack in the middle of the 2nd week, and much to my surprise, I've stuck with it every day so far.  Apparently structure, direction, and accountability aren't such terrible deterrents to getting something done... oh, and also it helps to have somebody scream at you through the tv screen (we'll just ignore any subtextual inferences about self-torture).  Really, it's about one thing:  know thyself.  Just because your goals may be more about proving obstinate points than getting ready for "bathing suit season" (does anybody believe this, really?) doesn't mean that they're still not goals.  And just because you don't like an activity enough to get through it without the driving distraction of screaming guitars or screeching trainers doesn't mean you can't reap the benefits of at least giving it a go.  And it never hurts to find a friend who not only doesn't think you're crazy for yelling back at the tv, but will air punch that bitch in the face right along with you.

Today, I decided to abandon all reason, lace up the shoes, plug in the tunes and hit the road before my normally scheduled workout.  I won't lie - I didn't like it.  But it didn't kill me.  I still got all the way through my workout, and I do feel a little proud... but not enough to brag about stats.  Who cares anyway?

PS - It should be noted that there is a diet to go along with the video.  I refuse to follow it, which will probably break any claims I have as to the efficacy of the system, but I figure that's a given.  I don't like diets; they're complicated, too frequently unfounded, and they make the joyous indulgence of eating boring and tedious.  Here's a little entertainment for you:  That Mitchell and Webb Look: Lifestyle Nutritionists

Adios til next time!

Runner's Log 2

It's been about a week since my last update, and I have gone running a grand total of two times.  I could go over a whole host of excuses, mainly involving my love of sleeping in and my innate talent for overbooking myself, but I've realized something about that inclination: who cares?  I'm pretty sure it's a monster genetically akin to the mutated form of worrying (my other special talent) and serves no greater purpose than to waste time and hot air - like a political ad sponsored by my own MicEnergy-Diversion Super PAC.  In fact, I think a thousand baby popples have starved to death just in the time that it took me to write this introspection.  Don't let the baby popples die.

Instead, we'll start here:  I've noticed a trend developing over the past few runs without my little electro-crutches.... I don't go as far.  In fact, I've dropped my distance by about two-thirds.  This is perhaps where a prudent person may start to examine various factors that could play into this, and where a maniacally-obsessed analyzer such as myself will chase down every rabbit hole until the path of reasoning tangles into a giant hairball suitable for choking on.  I'm going to liberate myself from that dirty task and just chalk it up to mental trickery and outside motivators.  My goal is not to run a marathon by the end of the month, it's to learn to like this thing... and I have to say on that note, it still sucks.  But hey, I increased my distance a little today.  Now it's off to the real races.